So, I stumbled upon an online news about a korean star who had committed suicide.
In case you are wondering, nooo no, I don’t watch K-Drama, so don’t look at me with that kind of stare, hehehe.
Frankly, I care less about the news, it was the comment below the news that caught my attention.
A commentator preached about how a person should have strong faith toward God, so that kind of tragedy won’t happen.
That just made my eyes couldn’t stop rolling.
I just want to say, SHUT UP BITCH! As if being faithful to God will make a person becoming a Superman. As if you know the mind of those who had killed themselves.
Imagine this, suddenly you are cast into the darkness, and you have to walk alone, you can’t think, only despair there, and suddenly death seems to be the easiest way to end it all. So it’s not about faith or choice, you just walk straight and ended up at the bottom of the abyss, mindless and lifeless.
So again, SHUT UP and live your life, just cherish your damn holy mind as long as you have it, and pray that God would give you endless light. Maybe you’ll get lucky because the God happens to have the very same faith as yours.
While tragedy will always be faithless.
Well darling,
If what you seek is morality,
I’m not the right person to look into.
I’m just a mortal,
struggling to hold my sanity,
as long as I could.
I come to believe that civilization is driven by human curiosity. We are what we are today because we always wanted to know the unknown, to seek the knowledge, to think the other way around. So, on that path, this is my thought.
At the time Adam and Eve lived in the garden, they actually had no curiosity, they lived in God’s will, till the moment Eve reached the forbidden apple (which is forbidden because God said so) and made it Adam’s apple instead, that was the moment of truth when they decided to live on their own will, to find out why and what.
Thus, God decided that Adam and Eve had passed all the qualifications to be independent, God gave them a new playground filled with mysteries an wonders waiting to be discovered. That was the first light of civilization.
That’s what I always believe, and if I’m wrong, then I have to say that what The God neglected was the fact that human is bound by dualism. Part of us enjoyed freedom with all the struggle, while others prefer to live as God’s pet. The deliverance is also perceived as a form of damnation.
So, some of us come out with the idea of religion, craving to be back to the garden, seeing that all the shits are a form of the God’s wrath, rejecting the idea of mankind determining their own fate.
Alas, that is a form of free will too.
So, go on. I completely forgot what this writing is about.
You know what? Trinity is not a myth, it’s the way this world goes around.
We as human being, live in three zones; black, white, and gray.
Surely you can argue that it should be only black and white, the yellow and green, or whatever the dualism is; and yes I would agree with you. Dualism should be the nature itself, just like you have two nose holes, two ears, two eyes, one hole for input and another for output. Sadly, when it’s about human being, most time we would have to take it apart from the nature, and yes, that would make the unnatural become part of the nature too, or is it just the two sided coin?
So, back to the trinity thingy and the zones, which one would I prefer? Should it be black, white, or grey?
Black and white are just like dictator and benevolent leader; gray is the opportunist (or situational wise if you love to put it that way).
Black and white are just like homosexual and heterosexual; gray is the bisexual being.
Which one will you choose?
Dictator would say, “Follow me or dead.”
And the benevolent leader would say, “Follow me and thou shalt be rewarded.”
While the opportunist is coming up with the idea of “Follow me, for the greater good.”
The homosexual prefers same sex, the heterosexual is the opposite sex, and the bisexual takes them all and set the rule about how being gay is about choice.
For now, I would personally say that I shall follow either black or white, definitely not the gray one. For me, it’s about being a person, where you can stand your ground. It’s a rigid path of glory or destruction.
This world we live in now is ruled by the grey, isn’t it? You might hold your idealism high at one time, and being forced to ditch it like shit at the other, and then you can pick it up again later. All for the namesake of the greater good.
In the end, would you be a one day glory phoenix, or thousand years surviving cockroaches? That’s your call.
jika tuhan itu pohon duit,
maka gua tinggal memanjatkan doa,
yang meraih hingga puncak ranting,
meluruhkan lembaran rupiah,
dan gua kaya raya sekaligus religius,
semua bahagia.
doanya yang tetap seperti monyet.
